What is "interpersonal conflict"? This was the question that came into my mind when I was reading the blog post rubric. So I had it googled and the result was "a situation in which one or both persons in a relationship are experiencing difficulty working or living with each other".The first thing that popped up in my mind was the title for this blog, A story about You, Me and Him. It is named as such because interpersonal conflict is a problem revolving all of us since no man on Earth is an island.
Deep down inside our heart, everyone has a story of You, Me and Him to tell. My story of You, Me and Him starts out with You and Me are brothers related by blood. You and Me were born into a poverty-stricken family, too poor to receive education. You and Me had to slog hard to make ends meet. Though the condition was harsh, those were the happiest time You and Me shared. Life was simple yet You and Me found true happiness and brotherhood. Once, You said into Me's face, We will stay together through ups and downs, no matter what. We made a vow on it. Since then, You are not You and Me is not Me. We ARE We.
With a leap of faith, We ventured into the business world full of unknown. For years, We sweated blood to make our very first pot of gold. We made it. Life was getting better and better for We. We could afford to buy houses, cars and eventually, started families. Not long after this, Him came into our life. Him started to gain on You for trust. You began to believe Him, though Him was just a NOBODY. Greed started to erode You's heart. You and Him ganged up setting up a trap for Me to fall into, unknowingly. Me left with nothing but You and Him just left Me in the lurch. Me had four mouths to feed...
You might notice that there is no ending for this story because it is up to us to paint the ending. If I were Me, I will definitely pick myself up and start everything from scratch. Well, you might argue that it is easier said than done, but c'est la vie! I have done it once, why deny myself from creating another miracle the second time? It is foolish to give up your life and hope for it will only bring more sufferings to your loved ones and grant You and Him their wishes to see you fall. Instead, you should make their jaws drop by standing up on your feet again.
I might be harboring hatred in my heart for long. One year, two years or even more time is required to heal the wound but nobody knows. Perhaps you can try to imagine yourself as Me in the above situation, will you be magnanimous enough to forgive and forget? In real life, things often turn out the other way. It always ends up with family tragedy or siblings fighting among each other for property and money. To err is human, to forgive is divine but in real life, how much can you and me practice this adage?
I really like your story even though it is fiction, it is really an interesting way to narrate a interpersonal conflict. Moreover, your story is very commonly seen in our daily life. I agree with your decision for Me to pick up himself and start off from scratch. Yes, it is easier said than done, but I believe, there is a time to cry and mourn for one's loss but after that, we have to be logical and practical. In your story, you mentioned that Me has 4 mouths to feed, so I believe that with responsibility and love for his family, he is able to pick up himself. However, about the part of forgiving and forget, I guess forgiving is a pretty hard thing to do for this situation unless You come begging for forgiveness. It would be a better decision to forget and shift one's focus.
ReplyDeleteHey!
ReplyDeleteYes, I do agree very much that to err is human and to forgive is divine and on top of that I believe to not forgive is to torture oneself. True forgiveness is not easy, especially if the action of the offender left a great devastation on one’s life. However, harbouring offense is more damaging for oneself than to the offender. While it may seem that hatred can ease the pain of the offense, in actual fact, it builds a prison, locking the victim and prevents the person from living a free and fulfilling life. Hatred is like a depressant drug; it does not solve the problem but numbs the pain. Stay on it long enough, one will get addicted and dependant on it and eventually it gains total control. Hence in the practical sense of things, even though to be able to forgive requires “divine strength”, the cons of unforgiveness can also be a source of motivation to attempt to forgive, if the very least, forget.
To end it off, I would like to make this statement: Why let someone actions affect our state of happiness? It is not worth it.
Jonathan's comments are so true, that harbouring unforgiveness in your heart actually harms you the most. By forgiving, you are doing yourself the biggest favour, not so much for the other person.
ReplyDeleteWe all know it is not easy to forgive, especially in situations of betrayal and a breach of trust. It will take a long time for the wounds to heal, but let them heal. I would recommend forgiving, but not forgetting. It is not remembering vividly the scenario, but to remember what you can learn from the situation, and move on from there. We all become stronger through life's experiences, especially those that we go through personally.
Hey Sushi,
ReplyDeleteA lovely way to narrate such a cruel reality!
Before I talk about the forgiveness, I will try my best to save my relationship with my friend. After all, we have gone through many hardships. Those memories also have a great impact on him. However, so many cases have shown that best friends drifte apart and families members alienate each other for desire and money.
I feel sorry for him andfor the sad ending of our friendship. I believe I will be angry for a period of time due to this betrayal. But eventually, I will forgive him as every one makes mistakes. The differences between his doing and I fail to submit homework is not as great as what we thought. We are all learning how to be a greater person. We are not perfect. It is just at the time he cannot tell the right from the wrong. And I feel sorry for myself also as I cannot help him to see this. If he want to continue our friendship one day, I will be happy to. To forgive him is also a form of give myself.
:)